New Year's Resolutions

KAT'S NEW (AND IMPROVED) YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS:

Do more writing. And for fuck's sake, SEND IT OFF. How on earth am I supposed to get published and discovered if I sit on my arse all day NOT having ideas?

Stop having one-night stands. No good can come of it. Yes, it's usually because I am bored, and once I start drinking, it's pretty hard to dissuade me. But if I HAVE to do it, use a condom, and at least make sure it is with someone attractive who I actually quite like, not an utter Neanderthal who is as desperate as me. If no-one wants to go home with me, then fine. Accept it, get a taxi and dig out the Rabbit.

Get my own place. Not only do I need to become independant and have some freedom again, but it would be so fantastic not to have to answer to parents all the time. And if I AM having one night stands, would probably be good to have somewhere to do it, hehe.

Lose weight. Not to conform to some media-approved ideal of "sexy" but to be healthier. My doctor has said it couldn't hurt me, it may even up my abnormal boob size, and god knows, maybe give me a bit more self-confidence. And on that note......

Be more self-confident. For fuck's sake, I am 22 years old, I should now be past caring about paltry matters and just live my life. If people don't like me, fuck them. There are others that do. If people don't want to have sex with me, or ask me out, than fine. Because someone will. Need to simply stand up and say "Fuck it" to the world. And even if that means I spend the best part of my life doing nothing but reading, writing, watching re-runs of 90's TV sitcoms and eating ice-cream, then so be it. Sounds like a sweet life.

Get a new wardrobe

Get a career. One that makes me happy. Or at least start earning absolutely WADS.

Learn to walk in high heels all the time. Can't live the rest of my life in trainers.

Achieve the goal I've had for 2 years and finally get 1000 songs on my Ipod.

This is a tricky one - I don't want to put "Get a boyfriend" because I've done that every year in a row. But I'm really so fed up of being single..... Hmmmm. Maybe just learn how to flirt, and start doing it more. If not get a boyfriend, then at least lavish all wasted excess energy on something else - writing, an evening class, exercising, ANYTHING.

Throw out all old lipglosses, clothes, vibrators, etc.... I'm never going to use/wear them again, must stop hoarding so much.

Be more spiritual and centered. This will surely help me to stop panicking so much, plus would be good to have something to hold on to and believe in.

Keep in touch with old friends.

Blog every day.

Keep my room tidy.

Practise cooking. Everyone loves a domestic goddess.

Stop thinking about Aaron and being sad. It happened, it's over with, and if there is any sense of justice or Karma in the world, he will strangle his tiny bitch to death in a horrific auto-erotic asphixiation sex accident, get sent to prison and raped, and eventually die of AIDS.

If I want something - buy it. Go shopping lots and lots. It feels good and it makes me happy.

Learn how to handle my drink.

Be un-endingly nice to people, even if they don't deserve it. People don't like bitches.

STOP APOLOGISING ALL THE TIME!!! This is an appalling habit, and I do it frequently, for big thing, little things, things I've not even done, things that other people had already forgotten, things that never need apologising for. Just STOP it altogether, create a ritual, chew something, do ANYTHING but apologize. It gets very wearing, and I've even had complaints. Similarly, stop feeling the need to justify everything I say or do. As Helena off "The L Word" once rightly said; "Never apologise, never explain." (Mind you, if I was as rich as her, I could probably afford to)

Above all - HAVE FUN. I'm only young once!!


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(PS: Wow. Not THAT many resolutions then.......)