Slightly frustrating Wednesday

Dear Diary,

Today was one of those strange days where you think everything is going to be positive...... and it all just turns out negative. Do you know what I mean? I HATE those days!

POSITIVE: I went to the JobCentre about getting help (i.e: FUNDS) for the BSL course.
NEGATIVE: I was told in no uncertain terms that they don't pay for people's courses unless there's already been a job offer at the end of it, and they have no idea who told me otherwise.

POSITIVE: I went to withdraw new-claim money to prepare for Lisa's visit (and pay bill)
NEGATIVE: My pissing claim hasn't gone through yet - therefore, no money.

POSITIVE: I promised Mum (and myself) I'd go to the gym today.
NEGATIVE: I didn't.

POSITIVE: I made tea.
NEGATIVE: It was ever so slightly terrible.

POSITIVE: Damien's gone home for a week.
NEGATIVE: We don't eat round the table together anymore.

POSITIVE: I wore my gorgeous red flats to work, to match my "sailor" outfit.
NEGATIVE: My feet were almost bleeding after an hour.

POSITIVE: The deaf punters came in.
NEGATIVE: I forgot to study my notes, and therefore had NOTHING to say to them.

It wasn't ALL bad though. I weakened, and got a Subway (yesterday was clearly a momentary lapse) on the way home. I sat and ate it whilst watching "Classic Albums - Pink Floyd." I was reminded just how much I bloody love "Dark Side of the Moon" and how I wish I had the money and resources to write, produce, and perform the whole thing myself. I watched "To Kill a Mockingbird" and remembered how fantastic a story it is, and how wonderful Gregory Peck was.
I got my super massive monster beast of a keyboard out for the first time in a YEAR and had an amazing time, pretty much jamming all afternoon. It was sweeeeeeeeeet. Especially when I taught myself how to play one of my favourites - "I'm not in love." Actually, that's no big achievement, you just press a button to start the backing beats, switch to a spacey synth-style setting (try saying that pissed), find the notes, and sing along. It sounded like a hybrid between the 10CC version and the Tori Amos version by the time I was done. Tasty!

Had a good shift at work, there were about 5 people in ALL night - so it pretty much flew by. Made good tips. Daydreamed/reminisced about that night with Kyle A LOT, wondering which emotion I felt more; guilt or arousal. Having said that, those two go pretty much hand in hand whenever I'm concerned! Thought about Gary, and decided I'm not arsed anymore. This has gone on long enough now, if it happens, it happens. If it's shit, I'll have learnt. Fuck it.

Got the open day up at the Deaf Centre tomorrow evening. Slightly nervous, but excited. And I'm going to ask if there's any discounts available for the course. If not, Mum's allowed me to dip into the Paris money. It'll be worth it, I suppose. My god, I always wanted to be an interpreter when I was younger. Imagine if I actually MADE IT?! Maybe not quite the translating I had in mind (French), but damn, it's an important skill. I'm EXCITED!! Or should I say....... (*waves clawed hands in opposite circles at either side of head*) See! I've done my research!!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Current Mood: sleepy and hungry
Current Music: "Shackles (Praise You)" - Mary Mary