Here in my car, I feel sexiest of all.....

Dear Diary,

I've changed my mind. YESTERDAY has become my happy place. Or more specifically, the inside of Joe's Saab. But I'm getting ahead of myself.....

Not much happened on Monday. I pottered round the house in my jimjams all day, tidying up so as to avoid ear-bashing upon Mum's return (with lodger Darren - it was his wife they were visiting) from La Gay France. When she did arrive home it was all very nice..... for about an hour anyway. She told us a hilarious story about getting her 20-euro tin of fois gras taken off her by airport security (she didn't seem to find it that funny) and wowed us all with tales of the weather, the cuisine, and the swimming pool. But after an hour or so, she was back to normal, questioning me about everything, criticising my ongoing lack of job and throwing "jokey" put-downs at Dad in front of Darren. I mean, come ON! She even asked why he hadn't trimmed the hedge while she was away. Bearing in mind that Dad had mown BOTH the gardens, tidied the entire garage, watered all the plants and helped tidy the whole house whilst only being home ONE AFTERNOON of the weekend. You could literally see his jaw drop in disbelief.


And at that moment, as much as I love Mum, I found myself just really really wishing she was back in France and I was miles away somewhere else, curled next to a warm body and falling asleep.

Managed to restrain myself from ringing Joe and begging to go over to his - mainly because I thought I ought to show more grit, but mostly because I can't stand the idea of sleeping at someone else's whilst it's the time of the month. I'm sure he wouldn't have minded, but we'd arranged to see each other Tuesday anyway.
(Told Mum all about Joe and our recent activities - excluding the sex, obviously - she doesn't seem as impressed as Dad, even when I mentioned all the romantic stuff. Oh well, wait till she meets him, then we'll see how polite she is!)

So Tuesday rolled around. Joe told me he had a surprise for me, he was taking me somewhere and I had to be ready by 7pm, dressed for the country. I wore a green leaf-patterned low-cut top, jeans and my leapord-spotted flats (Uninteresting, I know, but I like to remember these things) and we drove down the motorway, again, with the roof down. IT NEVER GETS OLD!!!! Ahem, scuse me......

Turns out he was taking me to an old favourite pub of his he used to go to before he moved to Czech (thank god I didn't eat tea beforehand). It wasn't REALLY in the country as such, but surrounded by fields and an incredible view of the Stockport/Manchester/Bury skyline, so might as well have been. We sat outside at the front, taking in the outstanding view and munching our way through a quickly-delivered magnificent 3-course pub meal. I was pretty much going into spasmic overdrive by then. (No I don't know what that means either, but it SOUNDS good, doesn't it?) So we talked, and talked some more.

As Joe and I continue to see more of each other, I'm learning several things about him that I never noticed to begin with. And as much as I really like him, there is one particular trait he has that drives me slightly mad. Sometimes it's sweet, sometimes it drives me up the wall. And I can honestly see now why people find ME so annoying sometimes - because I have the exact same trait.
He apologises for EVERYTHING. All the time. Whatever he's done, no matter how little someone else thinks of it, he thinks (and worries) about things too much. I recognised it straight away, and it alarms me because it's so familiar to me. No wonder I drive people barmy, I have to keep reassuring him all the time. I must say, it's a profoundly strange feeling to be the calm, un-flustered one for a change. It's quite nice, to be honest - I rather feel a new maturity about myself! And it makes me want to cuddle him a lot.

Anyway, we sat and watched the sun set over that wonderful skyline. It got chilly, so he took his jumper off and gave it me. And as I sat there, huddled in a man-jumper, looking at the red sun bleeding all over the sky and wiping up fudge cake-infused ice cream with my spoon, I found myself thinking something quite shocking - that the last time I could remember really feeling this happy (truly, not artificially) was when I watched the sun set over Paris from the Eiffel Tower with Lisa and Alice. Sadly, upon thinking this, I felt a little bit upset at the gravity of that thought, but thankfully my brain brushed it aside and focused on the happy instead.

Soon after retiring inside to warm back up, we decided to leave. And this is where it got a bit naughty. Maybe it was the gorgeous food, or the sunny evening/country air, I don't know, something got into me. Not like that, you filthy creatures! But after a fair amount of hinting and the realisation that it wasn't that late, we decided to take a little "detour," if you catch my drift..... His face was priceless - although I suppose my hand on his family jewels probably didn't help his driving concentration. Took us a while to find a quiet spot, but I have a feeling the position of my hand might've spurred him on, somewhat - not to mention we passed another car, the inhabitants of which clearly had the same thing on their minds.

Anyway, we soon pulled off the road towards a really nice massive pub/restaurant. The carpark was HUGE and deserted, but - despite Joe's assurances that hardly anyone goes there - I was too scared to venture in that far. So we pulled into a little alcove outside of the carpark, the seats pushed back. And, despite Joe's assurances that nobody goes there, we had about 38 cars drive past us. Figures.
We didn't have sex, obviously, (the logistical positioning was a nightmare as it was) but I was armed with condoms and did a pretty good job. Twice, if I'm honest! It was pretty funny, as I was terrified of getting caught and had to keep ducking and hiding everytime a car drove past, but then again, I suppose I did already have my head down..... Thank you, I'm here all week, try the steak! (God, I HAVE to stop laughing at my own jokes) I'm making light of it, but truthfully, it was pretty intense, especially as we weren't really able to do anymore than that, which made the restraint of it all wildly sexy.

Afterwards we lay in each others arms, him stroking my neck - which has the potential to sound madly romantic, were it not for the fact that he had to practically lie on the gearbox, and my chronic hayfever made me sniffle and sneeze every 5 seconds. My window was open, the night air evaporating the steam on the windows, and even though it was sending my hayfever into overdrive, I'd never felt so happy. Even though it was a complete pain and badly frustrating NOT to be able to have sex (*shakes fist at Mother Nature*) I was physically shaking afterwards. But at least I can be certain of one thing - the Spark is here to stay!

Not to mention I've had another romantic movie moment ("Titanic".....you know.... although it took every ounce of my restraint not to do the handprint thing - I'm a geek, I know) AND can scratch car-sex (kinda) off my "Things to do before I'm 30" list. Which I really should write down sometime....
It took forever, as none of us wanted to move, but we eventually managed to drive off. He dropped me at home, not a hair out of place and my top on the right way, as I bounced into the house, innocently telling Dad about staying "till Last Orders."

Eeeeeee, this is fun. I just really wish my fricking time of the month had picked another time of the month to arrive - namely NOT after we'd just discovered how much fun sex with each other was.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Current Mood: reminiscent
Current Music: "Cars" - Gary Numan (it got stuck in my head, for some reason)