Dear Diary,
Damn. Landlady was in an EXTREMELY happy mood tonight. Naturally, I capitalised on this STRAIGHT away - and yes, it turns out the 19th IS covered, I'M DOING A FRIDAY AT THE L***********, Y'ALL!! Sorry, got carried away - but in this desert of a thing called my Life, this is literally the most exciting thing to happen in my day. (*Sigh*)
So yeah - I'm in on Monday (the 15th) and then I'm off till the 26th. How fucking WICKED is that??! Made the shift seem a whole lot happier, despite the usual arseholes being in. Oh, on that note:
MORE THINGS I HATE ABOUT THE PUB:
Men with long fingernails. LONG. FINGERNAILS. For fuck's sake, don't they notice me wince and shudder when they hand money over and I get an accidental scrape? Get them cut.
One creepy (not to mention grumpy) guy who always stares - and after several drinks comes out with naught but one sentence: "You look really sexy tonight." Thanks mate, but not only am I wearing a brown t-shirt, jeans and a cardie, but you are nearly 70 - I wouldn't touch you with someone else's. Go down the street and hire a prostitute, because it's the only way you'll ever get laid again, you scary fucker.
On a similar note - punters who either try it on with me, or continuously advise me to wear fancy dress to the Christmas party tomorrow. Yeah, because I don't get ENOUGH innapropriate comments, sick innuendos and stomach-churning suggestions off you already, do I? No no, I'll just come into a pub full of horny, dirty old men, wearing a policewoman's uniform or a little dress. And while I'm at it, why don't I walk past a dark alley wearing a low-cut top, a short skirt and no knickers? Do they SERIOUSLY believe that if they keep at it long enough, the jokes, the little comments etc.... that I will eventually turn around and say: "OK lads, you've talked me round! Never mind that you are older than my dad and turn my stomach to the point where I feel like vomiting into the dishwasher - let's go back to yours so you can romance me with a curry and your battered-out porn collection!"
Walking on frigging eggshells around the Landlady. In a good mood, like today, she's a delight, funny as hell and always obliging. What's terrifying is the way it takes me about half an hour to even CONSIDER getting the courage up to think about entertaining the idea of asking her what I want.
Mum of Little Dickhead (whom you may remember from a few entries ago) Nice as she is, this lady does not give a single shit - and she doesn't care who knows it. She drinks like a trooper, always forces her opinion on you, and slurs her words to the point where you walk away cos you can't be arsed waiting 5 years for the rest of the sentence.
People who fanny about with change for about a decade, while I stand there tapping my foot. And then they get incredibly pissed off when I offer to find it myself. Just trying to do my job and speed things along, you collossal fuck-stick.
Now, people reading this are probably thinking; "What the fuck, Kat? A) It's called "banter" and "pub culture," and B) If you don't like it, don't get a job there!" But what can I say, it's the only other place that's hired me in 6 months. Aaaaaaaaaanyway. Told Rhianne and Landlady about my diet, which they immediately stamped on and told me to cut it the frig out. Apparently it sounds really bad - although, like I said, why would a GP recommend it?! But since this is like, the 4th time someone's said that to me in 2 days, I may consider a re-think. What I MIGHT do is combine aspects - like, follow the days and stick strictly to what you're allowed, like copious amounts of fruit, and veg soup, but maybe eat a LITTLE bit of something whenever I'm hungry. As long as I don't ever go mental and binge, and keep everything in moderation, should be OK. After all, I weighed myself tonight and I've lost about 4 pounds since last month already! I'll just eat healthy, stick as closely to the Diet as possible, do some exercise, and only have my Advent Calender chocolate for sugar.
Hmmm..... sumat tells me this is going to be tough. I've only been on it 2 days and I'm already bored and hungry. Major grrrrrrrr.......
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Current Mood: Hungry, believe it or not
Current Music: "Hallelujah" - Diana Vickers
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