New Diet

Dear Diary,

Today is a big day, for today (and I've lost count of the amount of times I've said this over the years) I am starting a New Diet.

My Auntie brought a copy the other day - it's incredibly specific, and apparently it's recommended by a Heart Doctor at a hospital, for patients who need to lose weight speedily before an operation. And also apparently - if you follow it correctly and do not cheat WHATSOEVER, you can lose 10-17 pounds.

In a WEEK.

That's a little over A STONE, in a week.

HOW COOL IS THAT??! Trouble is, I have to actually stick RELIGIOUSLY to the diet. Mind you, if it's only for a week - that's ONE WEEK out of my whole life. I'm sure I can manage to eat a load of shit I don't like if it's just for 7 days, and surely it will be worth it. Eeeeee, I'm excited! Just imagine, if I actually manage to do this, I will turn up at the L************* next week A STONE slimmer! Wonder if a STONE is actually equivalent to a dress size?! Sweet Christ, I could be a Size 14 by next week! And it says on the diet that you can re-start the diet whenever you want. So, I could do this in 3 consecutive weeks, and no matter how much I don't like what I'm eating, I will be down 3 stone by January!! And much healthier too, surely! Nice....... So today it starts - I can eat nothing but Vegetable Soup and fruit, but as much as I want. God, that might be awkward, taking a flask into work and looking some kind of fanatic. Still, needs must.....

For some reason, I was up and out of bed by ten past 8 this morning. Ten past 8. Yes, it's awesome, as I can do lots of jobs I'd normally do at the last minute, and watch all the episodes of "Southpark" Shaun and I taped last night (we've become obsessed with it lately). But there's another reason I'm up so early. Why is this? So I can spend a long time getting ready and looking as near to perfect as I can to go to work. Which is at 3 oclock. I'm such an almighty numpty. But hell, I need to be armed with AT LEAST lipgloss before I can see Lee, knowing that I've seen him without his lovely shirt on. That's a mind-trip a girl needs to be prepared for, surely?

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Current Mood: stupidly excited
Current Music: "Southpark" theme music