Strictly Come-Faces

KAT'S TOP 5 COME-FACES:

In no particular order (apart from chronological):

AARON: The " Wannabe Porn Star" Face - the face every man probably assumes at least once during crucial act at some point in his life. Absolutely hilarious - a mix of "I'm gonna fucking give it to you, you dirty bitch" and "Yeah, you like that don't you?!" Unfortunately, also with a slight tinge of "I'm going to lose control.....helllllllllp...." Overall result made him look fantastically goofy.
DAVID: The "Searching for a Saviour" Face - ok, so obviously sleeping with David wasn't a religious experience (well.... not in THAT way anyway, mmmm....) but his face at the crucial moment was neither hilarious or goofy, but a wonderful look of both quiet desperation and.... well, like he was looking for God or something. Exactly how I'd imagine the perfect come-face to look like - I say as if I'm a woman of great experience, ha-di-ha.
HENRY 8TH: The "It was dark so had to judge by Noises" Face - Title speaks for itself, as does the name. This paramour resembled our 15th century king (and not even the Will Young look-a-like off BBC2) so much that we did it in the dark. Couldn't even tell by the noises he made as there were none. He'd stopped for a whole minute before I even realised he'd finished - and that was only because he told me. Sudden thought: what if said extinguishing of illuminations was a move on his part, to hide MY body from HIS eyes? Worry, worry.
MIKE (36 year-old): The "I haven't unleashed the Dog of War for quite some time" Face - What else can I say, his come-face was probably the noisiest and most dramatic I've ever encountered, including my own. Whether this was a result of not having had his oats in quite a while, or the fact that I (STUPIDLY) let him ride bareback, I'll never know. On a side note, I know that if he's given me an STD in ANY shape or form, I will fucking murder him. Which leads us on to....
SIMON: The "I'm going to actually Kill You" Face - Favourite, and yet most brilliantly horrific come-face yours truly has ever encountered. Looking up at him from a Premier Inn pillow, I opened my eyes, and I tell you, a savage sort of pure rage coupled with a look of both effort and extreme concentration was enough to have me damn near wetting myself (and not in the way I'd hoped). Ended up rolling my head around like Linda Blair, keeping my eyes shut as if I was in the throes of ecstacy, whilst realistically in the throes of extreme side-splittery.

To quote the magnificent Robin Williams:

"Men can't fake an orgasm, who wants to look that dumb?!"

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Current Mood: giddy
Current Music: "Let's get it on" by Marvin Gaye - quite appropriate, really